“Actually…”

…Oh, you’re gonna hate me ALL OVER AGAIN for THIS one, Bruthas & Sistas! Put the word “actually” on your radar, not only when you’re listening, but when you’re talking, ’cause actually, the word has become the latest ubiquitous verbal plague to seep into everyones’ blatherings.

On the one hand, it is actually better than the word “like” I GUESS; less “Valley Girl”, if you will. And since it has more letters, and more syllables (3, or even FOUR, depending on where you’re from), it projects an air of greater intelligence and sincerity; by preceding a sentence, it alludes to the suggestion that what’s to follow has been “researched”, checked on Snopes, Google, etc.

In other words: “Pay PARTICULAR attention to what’s to follow fair listener, and getcher’ learn on, ’cause what I’m about to spout out is all IMPORTANT an’ shi’…”

Peggy had “Property Brothers” on earlier this week, after I made this “discovery”—the two of ’em musta used the word “actually” three hundred times in an hour! Correction—I just got an email from them: “Actually Dick, we only used the word ‘actually’ 292 times.”

There you have it. As usual, my advice is to DRINK HEAVILY…

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One thought on ““Actually…”

  1. A%^&*$#y THAT ubiquity was well established more than a decade ago, Dick. If you want to get a true taste of that smug, erudite, elitist “intellect” try watching ANY high end auto auction on TV. I’ve had just about enough of those pompous English windbags spewing the likes of their hot tea on my television screen. Yet another example of how media is vaginizing the American man. Now excuse ME while I go have another GULP of BLACK COFFEE.

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